A related article on the director.
A previous article by the same author.
Michael Kattner: "I enjoyed the production last night. You do a fantastic job of working with what is available. I sincerely congratulated Dianna for her exceptional work for this show. I love the 'Aqua-Socks' as shoes I will have to remember that one."
Josh Chambers [who didn't even see the show and incorrectly believes everyone he meets eats peyote]: Theatre Prof and all around Wild N Crazy Guy, Big Steve Schrum apparently has done it again, and hogged the spotlight. Schrum, a former CIA operative in Bogota, has decided to infiltrate the ranks of the Mauch Chunk Irregular Army with his crack group of thespian/commandos. The colonel of the acting brigade, Mr. Chris "Stoopid" Fordice, said of the planned takeover, "No problem, those inbred fools won't even know what's happening until it's too late. By then, we'll have every single last one of those *SLUR DELETED* strung up like Fender Stratocasters," or something like that.
Schrum, whose history is hazy at best, due to several unsolved and deeply mysterious fires that consumed every record in the Hazleton Family Dentistry's filing cabinet, was unable to be reached for a quote, as he was out in his Hum-Vee shooting badgers with his specially made Polish JD-34 fully automatic. Mr. Fordice, as usual, stepped in to offer an explanation for the bizarre actions, saying, "Steve's a really deep guy. Just the other day we accidentally walked in on him performing a Navajo Rain Dance in the Commons Building. This is pretty normal, but for some reason, the whole scene was done to the tune of ABBA's 'Fernando'. And then there was the time we all went out to the Laurel Mall Parking Lot and ate peyote. It was just plain existential debauchery, if you can catch my drift." Mr. Fordice was immediately whisked away by the PSU Huey, which was going on a search and destroy mission in Tamaqua.
